Sunday, July 30, 2006

Knife-Thrower

As a knife-thrower who performs with my wife in the circus, I never get a chance to relax. At work, I'm tense about stuff at home. At home, I'm tense about stuff at work.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Pull My Finger

A monk told Joshu: "I have just entered the monastery. Please teach me."

Joshu said: "Pull my finger."

At that moment the monk was enlightened.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Broken Vase

I dropped a vase and broke it while listening to a record. So I just played the record backwards until the vase came together again on the floor and hopped up to my hands.

Friday, July 14, 2006

Game for Party

Make one-eighth-inch incision connecting fang marks. Suck out venom and spit it out in container at hips.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

My Girlfriend

My girlfriend got a bottled waterbed.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Last Night

Last night I ordered a whole meal in Chinese. Even the waiter was amazed. I was in a French restaurant.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Some People

Some people just don't like to act as if they think the other person is right too soon. For instance she still won't admit that she's gotten to like four-liter jugs of Carlo Rossi burgundy. I don't mean that it's as good as the other stuff, but you do get to like it.